More Laughs with the Dan Man

Daniel saw a friend of mine today, and she asked him for a hug.
"No, I'm not going to hug you," he told her.
"Why not? You hugged me last time I saw you. You gave me a big hug. Why don't you give me a big hug today?"
"I'm not going to hug you today," (with a big smile, of course).
I took the little guy gently and turned him to look me in the face, and tried to gently coax him into giving her a hug.
"No, I'm not going to hug her."
"Why not, Daniel?" I asked.
"Because I'm doing a pattern," he says.
"A pattern?"
"Yes. I hugged her last time. I'm not going to hug her today. Then, next time I see her, I'll hug her again. Then the next time I won't. It's a pattern."

We got a good laugh out of that one. Then he asked her what that line was on her chest. Cleavage! Funny boy. He keeps us laughing, for sure!

Go to the Ant (with guns?)

We've been working on memorizing some passages of scripture as a family, and we recently began working on Proverbs 6:6-11. Kris was helping out at church one evening while I was doing "Bible time" with the kids, and we thought it would be fun to make up motions to surprise him the next night. We had a blast.
The next night, we gathered around for Bible time and excitement built as we anticipated performing our motions for Daddy. When the time came, the three boys left the room.
Kris was baffled as to why they suddenly left, and one of them said he needed to get a gun.
"How could they possibly need a gun for their Bible verse?"
I sank a bit lower in my chair, looking guilty. "Actually, they kind of do need a gun. We made up motions. You'll see."

So we did them.
"Go to the ant, O sluggard; (Crawl fingers of one hand along the other hard, like a tiny ant, walking)
consider her ways, and be wise. (Stroke your beard)
Without having any chief, officer, or ruler, (Salute)
she prepares her bread in summer (Knead bread)
and gathers her food in harvest. (Gather food off the ground)
How long will you lie there, O sluggard? (Tap your watch)
When will you arise from your sleep? (Pretend to sleep)
A little sleep, a little slumber, (Continue to sleep)
a little folding of the hands to rest, (Fold hands/twiddle thumbs)
and poverty will come upon you like a robber, (Cry out in surprise)
and want like an armed man." (Aim your weapon of choice - they boys' favorite part!)

What a fun verse this was to memorize!

Symbolic Stones

Our journey to Coram Deo Academy takes us through a neighborhood, and last October on the way home from school, Thomas called my attention to a particular yard.

"Mom! Look! That's really neat!!"

"What do you see, Thomas?"

"Mommy, that person who owns that house put up the Ten Commandments in their yard!"

Halloween.

Tombstones.

I'm glad that the things of God were on Thomas's mind, anyway! I think it's interesting that the Ten Commandments do loom large like tombstones in that they point out our complete inability to attain acceptance before God. No one in all the world, except Jesus Christ, has ever obeyed them perfectly. They are a bit symbolic of our doom, like tombstones, if we take Christ out of the picture.

Updates

These next few posts are several things I've been wanting to write down from the last few months...

Out of the mouths of babes...

The other day, Daniel repeatedly asked me if I would do something. I gave him an indefinite answer, not really wanted to commit myself. And he kept asking. And asking. So, I proceeded to give him a lesson on nagging, explaining that asking over and over wears people down, sometime makes them irritated, and then they really don't want to give you want you want. He was thoughtful for a moment, then he says, "God isn't like that."

Astonished, and wondering what his reasoning was, I asked him what he meant. He said something along the lines of, "If you ask and ask God, He listens and answers." I was shocked, and guilty, all at the same time. I am so thankful that the Lord helped him to understand his recent lesson about Hannah, who asked and asked for her precious son Samuel. God is so good to reveal His character and truth to the hearts of children!

Boats and Arrows

Thomas came home from Kindergarten last Wednesday with a mission: he had to build a boat. He first filled the sink and asked for the foil. He attached a sail with some tape. I handed him a plastic container when his foil idea foiled. I was busy about the house and heard some noises. I looked up about the time he asked me if I could position the box fan on the counter for him; he had retrieved it from the garage and placed it in front of the kitchen sink. Wind.

When I suggested he move his expedition to our master bath tub, he unplugged the fan and flew through the house. He spent literally hours last week designing and constructing sails and taping skewers for the masts. Then he would watch them sail in the bathtub in the wind. (Honey, sorry about the water bill...)

Then, Saturday, he asked if I had something sharp. Music to every mother's ears. Why? He wanted to make a bow and arrow, he said. I had the same wooden skewers that served as masts. Thomas like that idea! He found a stick outside, had Kris saw notches on each end, and strung a rubber band through the notches. He also requested that notches be cut on the ends of the skewer arrow to hold it on the bowstring. And lo and behold, it shoots! David and Daniel and our neighbor friend all have bows and arrows now, with the arrows color coated so they don't get them mixed up (all their idea). And they made a target out of a box. David can even make the skewers stick in the target. Fun fun!

Blogging

I haven't blogged in a year and three months. We moved. Life happened. I just didn't do it. I keep thinking about this little space, wondering if I would ever use it again. And it's the fun things the kids do that makes me wish I would take a minute to document it.

I also feel a little self absorbed when I blog. Like I'm showing the world what my family is up to in a self-promoting way. I really don't want to be like that. I don't usually feel like other people do that. Anyway, I felt like I needed a little post in between June 2010 and today. So this is it. (Wow...this blog is interesting. Yawn.)

It doesn't matter

The three of you who faithfully check my blog even though I rarely post already know that our house is for sale. This has been an unexpected journey through fear, uncertainly, and restlessness for me. I never imagined myself to be a fearful person, but God has used this process to root out some things in me that I would have been much more comfortable leaving buried (although we both know that God's goal is not to make us more comfortable but more holy, which eternally benefits us but it doesn't feel good right now!).

When our For Sale sign went up, so did my peace of mind...in smoke.

What if it doesn't sell and the market takes a dive and we can't sell for years?
What if it doesn't sell until school starts?
What if we can't move, and we are faced with living far away from our church? However can we really have the biblical community we long for for ourselves and our children if we live so far away?
What if we have to find a different church? We love the one we've found, and we really do feel like the Lord led us there.
What if we can't find a place to live that we can afford?
What if what if what if.

I realized a couple of weeks ago that I was NOT okay with our house not selling. This was a BIG RED FLAG. What if God's will is for us to stay put? Am I okay with that?

What about God's will, Julie? Don't you trust that God is in control? Yes.
Don't you know that God is in control of the real estate market? Yes.
Don't you know that God knows that we have four kids and that moving during school will be harder? Yes.
Don't you trust that God has given you these desires for biblical community, and that He cares more about the spiritual nurture of your family than you do? Yes.
Don't you trust that God will provide for your family's needs, no matter where you are? Yes.

Then why am I afraid? Because I know that God doesn't always do for us what seems best to us. Sometimes He plans things for us that are uncomfortable, and sometimes downright difficult. I don't want my life to be difficult. I want it to be easy.

But I must face this sin: Am I living for Him, or for me? Am I willing to serve and follow Him, as long as it is comfortable for me? Am I willing to follow Him into valleys, trusting that the strong hand leading me will never fail or leave me alone? My anxieties, I'm afraid, are revealing that I am way too committed to myself and not to Him.

I certainly don't have all the answers for dealing with this, but I did pick up a book I have enjoyed so far called Running Scared, fear, worry and the God of rest by biblical counselor Ed Welch. I am planning to work through this book and looking forward to being encouraged to pursue the Lord through these struggles.

I also keep reviewing a phrase that I read somewhere, maybe from Elisabeth Elliot. She talked about being "indifferent in the will of God." Basically, we should be so committed to Him, so sure of His love and care, and so desiring for our lives to bring Him glory, that we simply don't care what He does with us. We know He will walk with it through us. We know that following Him will bring immeasurably more joy than walking in our own way, and we just want to bring Him glory. It doesn't matter to us what He plans and ordains, because we know that "If God is for us, who can be against us?"

So, I am trying to keep my eyes on Him and not on our schedule of showings, and praying for my desire to glorify Him to increase, and my desire to serve my own desires, even if they seem like good ones, to diminish a bit. It struck me the other day that God can resurrect someone from the dead to buy our house. It's SO not an issue for Him. I know He's much more concerned about my heart being happy in Him, trusting Him, and not worrying about tomorrow.

Mercy

I have a homeless friend that I met through FBC Parker, and I have had the privilege of taking her around to try to get her state ID and to the Dollar Tree and various other things. When I first started doing this, I was eager to treat her to a meal, even if it was just McDonald's. I was excited about letting her order the most expensive meal on the menu, and wanted her to enjoy it. I was feeling merciful. I was so struck by the thought that the Lord's mercy toward me is similar, so I thought. I was totally undeserved, His enemy, not able to contribute anything to Him or give Him anything at all. I was dead and hopeless, and then He reached out in love toward me and saved me. We are ALL like this, my friend, myself, and every human except Christ Jesus who has ever lived.

As the weeks and months went by, I realized that my "mercy" was indeed not quite up to par with the mercy of the Almighty (imagine that?). I realized this a few weeks ago on another of our McDonald's visits. There we were, laptop on the table to help my friend submit some online job applications. I pre-packed PBJ for all of us and thought we could just buy something off of the dollar menu, one for each of us, so that would be $6 plus tax...seemed like a good way to be a good steward of my money. We had eaten out so much lately that I wanted to save a little! And I figured that of course the kids and my friend would all be okay with PBJ and we could look forward to a treat from the dollar menu. Well...

It didn't go so well. She HATES jelly, she informed me. And it is too difficult for her to chew peanut butter on bread. She was not interested in my thrifty idea. So, no problem (inward growl), I will buy her a meal and the rest of us will stick to the game plan. A cheeseburger isn't too pricey, right? Well, she wanted a salad meal...only the most expensive meal on the menu (it seemed to me). So I shuffled up to the counter to order, spending half of my money on my friend and the other half on the other 5 of us (grumble, grumble).

Thankfully, when I returned to the table with our food, I needed to take the kids to wash their hands, and the Lord graciously spoke to my heart as we were hand-washing.
The Holy Spirit brought to mind these phrases from Scripture: "His mercy endures forever" and "His mercies never come to an end."

These verses convicted me so much. My mercy had waned. It was almost non-existent, actually. But His doesn't wane. His mercy endures. Even in the face of our blatant sin - our mis-understanding of His greatness and power and goodness - He is still merciful. We take His gifts without giving Him the praise due Him, and He keeps giving to us anyway. We reject His ways and try to arrange our life how we'd rather have it, and He continues to pursue us, continues to help us see His faithfulness, continues to reassure us that He loves us. He is so merciful and He will continue in His mercy. His mercy won't end. His mercy won't wane for His children.

I returned to the table with a totally different attitude toward my friend and her desired salad meal. How much I needed to learn! I was ashamed of my previous attitude, and hopeful that it hadn't shown through my face and body language to my friend. Please don't read into this that my friend was ungrateful for what I had given her in the past. She always seems grateful and appreciative, which even more highlights the difference between my limited mercy and the enduring, unfailing mercy of God towards ungrateful me.

This was a powerful experience for me in understanding God's mercy. I pray that my sinful heart will grow in this as the Lord continues to show this undeserving sinner His great mercy.

Ash and Jenn

A wonderful blessing of our trip to Asia was the time I was able to be around two mothers: Ash and Jenn. As God made us to live in a community and not in isolation, I really felt the benefit of living alongside these ladies while on our trip. There is no influence like the one that is constantly there, visible day in day out, in the midst of all the inconveniences in life. I believe that we can hardly spur one another on toward love and good deeds if we only see one another a couple of hours a week for a church service. So I was very encouraged and blessed by the constant good examples these two were for me, and I pray that their graces have rubbed off on me a little. (Lord, PLEASE work in me the way You have in them!)

These two young women will definitely be first to say that they are sinners like everyone else, and if I saw something good in them, it is because of God's work in their hearts and lives and not because of their own efforts and goodness. And I definitely want to reiterate those truths...this is the Lord's doing.

With that said, I want to recall a few things that I noticed about them that were so helpful for me. First, the way they spoke to their children was perpetually calm and kind. They were sweet. They were enthusiastic. I clearly remember one afternoon feeling the dull, sleepy tug on my energy and hearing Ash's joyful voice greeting her preschooler who just walked in the room with a smile and energetic hello and hug. How could he not know his mother's love and care for him!?!

When you are with a family with young children for more than a few hours, you inevitably witness the children doing something that is...disobedient. And watching these parents respond was helpful because they were so matter-of-fact. Hearing Jenn (and Bill, too!) speak to Katherine in those moments was priceless, because they were so calm. Even while she was crying in protest and refusing to obey (even if just for a moment - she's a sweet and obedient little girl most of the time!), they would not show any signs of frustration or irritation with her.

The day we left Cambodia, Kris and I were scurrying around to finish packing and Jenn (remember that she had a 6 week old baby!) was preparing lunch for all 9 of us not counting Isaac (after church, and the electricity had been off all morning, so the easy crock pot method was out and it was Plan B). We were a little pressed for time because we needed to eat and then head to Phnom Penh. The kids were playing around the house (think lots of laughing, stomping, noise!), and she was trying to cook and keep them out of the kitchen, but Daniel and Katherine seemed to toddle in there time and again. Not only that, but Daniel would help himself to water and spill it. But she never raised her voice. She was never impatient. She kindly and calmly corralled them out time and again. I was so encouraged. I was encouraged because it revealed to me that God is able to give us this kind of patience. I know Jenn is human, but seeing her ability to deal with this (I am sure I would have been rude or flustered!) helped me realize that it is POSSIBLE! Nothing is impossible with God!

Watching these moms kindly and calmly train their children was so helpful. I realized that I often stress out that my kids "aren't there yet" in a certain area. I desperately need to relax and be more laid back about the discrepancy between my standard and and their performance. I remember Mrs. Judy (my former pastor's wife, in heaven a year now) saying that kids shouldn't be expected to be little soldiers, performing according to commands given with flawless precision. Instead, we should see our job as parents as directing them down a path, pointing them in the right way and constantly helping them along. I think Ash and Jenn do such a great job of this. And I haven't even mentioned how precious their little ones are and what a delight they are to be around.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Ash and Jenn, for giving our family the opportunity to live with you guys for a short time! You are treasured friends!

Thank you so much, Father, for taking care of me and giving me this gift of two blessed mothers to help me learn and grow as a mother myself. You have shown me Your goodness not only by giving me this experience, but also by reminding me that it was You all along that strengthened and taught these women. And you are with me too, and will never leave me nor forsake me.